i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
