He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
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maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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