i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
