Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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