you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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