This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
