Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I will be naked everywhere
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
My vagina is officially offended.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
