we're blogging at a bar
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize
