I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
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