Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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