Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
