"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize