I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
