Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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