Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
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he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
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Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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