so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
