..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
