Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize
