Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
