you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
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