is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize