just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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