i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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