This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
