my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
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