you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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