I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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