shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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