To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
