Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
