Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Who wears a wallet chain?!
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
