He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
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America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
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Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.