I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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