I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
