so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
