Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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