I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. đź’€
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
