He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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