I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
