Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
