Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
