alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
