So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I could fuck to npr.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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