The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
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