Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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