she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Randomize