Kiss
Puke
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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