My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
