my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
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