Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
