Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize