Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
